Tang "moon men"

Tang instant breakfast drink was well known for associating itself with the NASA space program, since it was one of the "dehydrated" drinks used by the astronauts.

One series of commercials in the early 1970s were animated, and involved a group of four moon creatures. They spoke perfect English, and their primary focus was on acquiring Tang, both Orange and Grape flavor (which came in a jar at the time). Among the commercials (names not official):

THE HOTEL
1: "Well the hotel is all done"
2: "What?"
1: "The hotel. The astronauts have to pay us Tang to stay here."
2: "It won't work"
1: "But why? They get free oxygen, a good view of the Earth"
2: "It won't work"
1: "But look at that golf course we built, with 18 million holes" (as one of them putts a golf ball in to a small crater)
1: "I'm telling you it won't work"
2: "Why not?"
1: (smugly) "They stopped sending men to the moon! Ha ha ha."

THE SONG
1: "Here is a song to get the astronauts back."
2: "And this song is so good they'll have to come back"
1; "That way we can get more Tang"
All: (singing) "Twinkle, twinkle little jar, how I wonder where you are. Up above the..."
3: "Hold it. HOLD IT!" (singing stops.) "Seems to me I heard that song before."

MISSION TO MARS
1: "I told you Mars is orange and not red. Now we'll see if Mars really tastes like Tang."
2: (dissolves some Martian soil into a glass of water) "One small sip for me, one giant drink for mankind.
(takes a swig. In a pained voice cries out) "That's not Tang!" (collapses).
3: "Luckily I brought the real Tang, both Orange and Grape flavor."
2: (wakes up dazed) "Where am I?" (3 pours some Tang in his mouth.) "Now that's Tang. I must be in heaven!"

ROCKS FOR TANG
1: Aww, we're all out of orange Tang.
2: Darn, the grape-flavor's gone too.
3: Well why don't we go to the Earth and get some more. I can trade them some rocks. (as he tosses some lunar stones into a bag)
1: Rocks? For a great-tasting drink with a full-days' supply of vitamin C?
3: You'll see.
(flying saucer heads to Earth)
1: What is vitamin C, anyway.
(flying saucer returns to Moon)
3: We got it. Tang. Both orange and grape flavor.
1: For a bag of rocks. (camera focuses on Earth in lunar sky) Sometimes I wonder if there's intelligent life on that planet.

DARK SIDE OF THE MOON
(one of the moon men is dressed in a carnival-style hat and striped shirt, and is standing behind a wooden stand while holding a cane/pointer)
1: Hurry hurry hurry, step right up. See the dark side of the moon! You just pay Tang to see it.
(A group of moon people hand the barker some tang jars. They cross over the lunar terminator into total darkness, and just their eyes are lit up)
"ooh.. ow.. where am I... you're on my foot... oh this is spooky... let's get out of here"
(They cross back over to the lighted side)
"WE were gypped. We want our great-tasting Tang back."
1: (relents and gives them the Tang back) "What did you expect? There's nothing to see in the dark anyway"

Chips Ahoy! cookies

Two series of commercials for Nabisco's Chips Ahoy! chocolate chip cookies.

Circa 1973
These commercials involved a cheesy superhero figure named "Cookie Man" Can't remember exactly what he looked like, but I know he wore some form of blue tights. I think there was a logo of sorts on his chest. The commercial began with a "secret identity" character.

A narrator did a pun-filled voiceover as some crazy villain was trying to steal the man's Chips Ahoy! cookies. In one spot it was a giant telephone. The man ran into a phone booth, but the phone was out of order and it tried to eat the man's cookies. "..it's another big phony." Something then happened to transform him, "...and it's Cookie Man". Punching the giant telephone's dial, literally, "He's got their number. What an operator. Long distance!!"

The ad always ended "...with an average of 16 chocolate chips. From Nabisco."

Circa 1976
These commercials were animated, and had a "chocolate mountain" that looked remarkably similar to a giant chocolate chip. A narrator sung:
"In a secret land, very far away
lies a chocolate mountain, where work is play
And on that mountain is a Chips Ahoy! mine
Where folks are chipping chocolate chips all the time."

Shows a bunch of kids with machinery distributing chips into huge cookies, one at a time.

"...chocolate chips galore,
till there's hardly any room for one chip more
And if you'd like a taste of chocolate mountain, boy
munchy crunchy chocolate chip-filled Chips Ahoy!"

Welcome - Cocoa Krispies with Ogg

Ancient Chinese secret, huh?
Ring around the collar!
Where kids are king.

Remember these lines? Yes, some of the most creative TV commercials were in the 1970s, yet comparatively few of them remain available on the likes of YouTube. Perhaps this was because the 70s commercials were between the well-preserved black-and-white films of the 50s and 60s, and the VCR-era ads of the 80s and 90s. Indeed, many of the surviving color commercials from the 70s have faded.

In this blog I will post periodic, approximate memories of 1970s TV commercials as they come to mind -- which happens to me a LOT. Be sure to post a comment if you remember the commercial, a variation, or have a correction.

So, let's get started.

Kellogg's Cocoa Krispies cereal with caveman Ogg.
circa 1971
Long before the likes of Coco the Monkey, the spokesman for Cocoa Krispies was a caveman named Ogg. (His wife's name was Kell. Kell-Ogg, get it?) The commercials took place in a prehistoric setting, and was often found showing off his stone-age inventions while enjoying Cocoa Krispies cereal. Ogg spoke with a half-British accent of some sort. A very impressive stop-motion animation technique was used.

I remember two of these:

1. (Ogg is walking on top of a tire-like object as it rolls)
Voice: "What's that, a wheel?"
Ogg: "No, it's my latest invention, which allows me to ride and eat Kellogg's Cocoa Krispies cereal at the same time."
(Ogg is seen eating a bowl of cereal while walking atop the "wheel")
Voice: "Really? What's it like eating Cocoa Krispies, going down steep hills?"
(Ogg is now struggling to eat and stay atop the wheel as it rumbles down an incline)
Ogg: (gives a description of the cereal with an edge of fear in his voice. Finally he wipes out. From amidst the wreckage: )
"Finished eating. I think I'll invent a brake."

2. (Ogg is standing atop a small mountain, as a huge bird or pterodactyl approaches him)
Voice: "Ogg, WATCH OUT!!"
The bird picks Ogg up and gets him on his back.
Ogg: "Whew, I almost missed my flight. The meal they serve on this flight is Kellogg's Cocoa Krispies cereal."
(Ogg is seated on the back of the flying avian creature with a bowl of cereal, or more likely a "complete breakfast" in front of him. Standard description of cereal follows.)
Voice: "Wow, you sure are good at flying"
(Bird releases Ogg atop a very tall and thin mesa)
Ogg: "Oh, the flying's easy. (loud despearate voice) But what's hard is, getting down from the airport!"

The Ogg character was retired in about 1975, at which point he was replaced by a brown elephant named "Tusk Tusk".